Shakespearean Insulter Generator

Stressed out? Nerves frayed at the end of the semester? Find yourself in dire need of expressing yourself, but concerned about doing it well since you're a Humanities major? Try the Shakespearean Insulter!

The generator freshly coins some of the insults from Shakespeare's adjectives and nouns, but others are direct quotations, such as this zinger from The Two Noble Kinsmen:

[Thou] shall stand in fire up to the navel and in ice up to th'heart, and there th'offending part burns and the deceiving part freezes.