If I Ran the Zoo . . .

Inspired by Dr. Seuss's If I Ran the Zoo, the editors of the National Association of Scholars have asked some of their friends and colleagues to imagine how they would change higher education if they ran "the zoo."

The responses are interesting, thoughtful, and amusing. In "If I Ran the University Zoo," Adam Kissel starts his poetic response by saying,

If I ran the university zoo,

The number of administrators would be divided by two,

And two, and two, and two, and two,

Leaving more resources available for me and for you.

Another responder, John Leo, says,

Here’s a simple suggestion

(Avoiding all fads)

I’d have some professors

Who teach undergrads

Most of the responses are in prose. Mark Bauerlein's suggestion is "one simple rule":

The rule is: every professor in English, history, philosophy, foreign languages, classics, various “studies” programs, art history, education, film, creative writing, and journalism would have to teach one section of freshman composition each year.

You can read all the solicited and unsolicited responses to NAS's challenge on the NAS web site.